As a Clinical Sexologist, I am concerned about the sexual health of my clients. While my focus has always been primarily on relationships, my drive to return to school to gain specific and specialized knowledge about sexuality was to strengthen my skill set in working with all couples.
What are examples of issues that you see related to sex and sexuality?
- lack of sexual desire
- mismatched sex drives
- difficulty with orgasm or experiencing pleasure with sex
- cross-dressing husband or partner
- coming out (including coming out as lesbian to husband, coming out as gay to wife)
- compulsive sexual behaviors
- gender identity concerns
- concern with fetish or paraphilia
- negotiating an open relationship or polyamorous relationship
- overcoming painful sexual interactions or experiences with spouse or partner
What happens in sex therapy?
Sex therapy is much like traditional psychotherapy. Sessions unfold in a similar fashion, through conversation designed to explore the concerns that drew you to counseling. Once it is understood what your concerns are, focus will turn toward understanding the history and development of your particular situation and it will be important to gain a clear understanding of how your presenting concern affects you, and what you hope to see change in your life. Through a combination of talk therapy, homework (reading suggestions, written exercises, or possibly physical/sexual exercises depending on the issues), you will be supported and encouraged to find greater peace with the issues that led you to therapy.
How long does sex therapy take?
As with most therapy, the initial process tends to be more intensive, and often the frequency of visits will depend on your budget and the intensity of you concern or crisis. For some individuals or couples, the concerns have been with them for years, and it is not a crisis, as much as it is a desire to begin the change process. In these situations, you may feel more patient and decide to meet once monthly as you approach this process gently and pace yourself. For some, like those dealing with infidelity or the discovery that your spouse or partner is a lesbian, or that your husband has withheld feelings throughout your marriage that he is gender dysphoric and wants to live as a woman – these are examples of more urgent situations that often throw people into crisis. This would likely necessitate weekly sessions. Sessions continue until you get your needs met. Ultimately, you are in charge of how long we meet and how often we meet.