Lesbian Sex Therapy, Online

For women who love women and want more from their sex life. Or want it back. Or just want to stop avoiding the conversation.

You love each other. You like each other. And somewhere along the way, sex went from something you did to something you talk about not doing. Or one of you wants it more, the other feels the pressure, and now even a back rub comes with a subtitle.

You’re not broken, and you’re not alone. This is some of the most common, most fixable work I do.

Why a Lesbian Sex Therapist?

Most sex therapy was built around heterosexual couples: his desire, her desire, intercourse as the main event. That model doesn’t fit two women, and you shouldn’t have to translate your relationship for your therapist before you can get help.

I’ve worked with couples for nearly 30 years, most of them lesbian and queer women. I’m a board-certified clinical sexologist with a PhD in clinical sexology, and my doctoral research surveyed 498 lesbians about sexual frequency and relationship satisfaction. When you tell me what’s happening in your bedroom, or what isn’t, I won’t need a glossary.

What We Work On

• Desire differences. One of you wants more, one of you wants less, and you’re both tired of the standoff.
• The “lesbian bed death” worry. It’s a phrase, not a diagnosis. My doctoral research looked at exactly this question, and we’ll look at what’s true for the two of you.
• Menopause and midlife changes. When bodies change, desire often follows. You work with your doctor on the hormones. I’ll help with the conversation at home.
• Getting started again after a dry spell, a new baby, an illness, an affair or a long stretch of just being busy.
• Talking about sex without someone getting hurt, defensive or quiet.
• Initiating. Who starts things, how, and what happens when the answer is no.
• Feeling at home in your body so you can actually enjoy being in it with her.

How It Works

Sessions happen online by secure video, so you can meet from anywhere in Indiana. Sex therapy is talk therapy. Nothing physical happens in session, and you’re never asked to do anything in front of me. We talk, you practice at home at your own speed, and we adjust from there.

Most couples are surprised how quickly things shift once they can finally talk about it without bracing for impact.

Not in Indiana? Let’s Work Together Through Coaching.

Therapy is limited to couples in Indiana, where I’m licensed. If you live anywhere else, I offer intimacy coaching online. We’ll work on the same things: desire differences, initiating, talking about sex, and finding your way back to each other. Coaching is forward-focused and educational. It isn’t therapy and doesn’t diagnose or treat mental health conditions.

Prefer to start on your own? My Lesbian Sex & Intimacy course is open to women everywhere.