Lesbian Sex Therapy and Sex Therapist

  • Do you wish you could find that spark you felt when you first met her?
  • Are you feeling undesired, rejected, and questioning why she doesn’t want to have sex as often as you?
  • Is it confusing that she was so much more sexual at the start of your relationship and now you can’t remember the last time you had sex?

 

What are examples of issues do you see as a lesbian sex therapist?

  • lack of sexual desire
  • mismatched sex drives
  • infidelity
  • difficulty with orgasm or experiencing pleasure with sex
  • coming out in marriage / mixed orientation marriages (including coming out as lesbian to husband\
  • mixed interests / unsatisfying sex
  • negotiating an open relationship or polyamorous relationship
  • overcoming painful sexual interactions or experiences with spouse or partner

 

 

What does a lesbian sex therapist do?

Sex therapy is much like traditional psychotherapy.  Sessions unfold in a similar fashion, through conversation designed to explore the concerns that drew you to sex therapy in the first place. Once it is understood what your concerns are, focus will turn toward understanding the history and development of your particular situation and it will be important to gain a clear understanding of how your presenting concern affects you, and what you hope to see change in your life.  Through a combination of talk therapy, homework (reading suggestions, written exercises, or possibly physical/sexual exercises depending on the issues), you will be supported and encouraged to find greater peace with the issues that led you to therapy.

 

How long does lesbian sex therapy take?

As with most therapy, the initial process tends to be more intensive, and often the frequency of visits will depend on your budget and the intensity of you concern or crisis.  For some individuals or couples, the concerns have been with them for years, and it is not a crisis, as much as it is a desire to begin the change process. In these situations, you may feel more patient and decide to meet once monthly as you approach this process gently and pace yourself.  For some, like those dealing with infidelity or the discovery that your spouse or partner is a lesbian, or that your husband has withheld feelings throughout your marriage that he is gender dysphoric and wants to live as a woman – these are examples of more urgent situations that often throw people into crisis.  This would likely necessitate weekly sessions.    Sessions continue until you get your needs met.  Ultimately, you are in charge of how long we meet and how often we meet.

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ABOUT Michele O’Mara, LCSW, Ph.D.

Relationships are my thing. Some would say, my obsession. While I only scored an 83.75% on my own "How Lesbian Are You" test,  don't let that fool you. Since returning to school in the '90s for my MSW, I knew exactly what I wanted to do: help lesbian couples grow love. 

I am that person who has built her life around one thing: lesbian relationships and women loving women. For fun, I do things like create online quizzes at asklesbians.com, to learn more about real lesbians. Or I write books. like, "Just Ask: 1,000 Questions to Grow Your Relationship," to give couples an easy way to communicate. (www.1000question.app) And, now that our boys are young men, my love, and my wife, Kristen, and I are growing lesbian love through Lesbian Couples Retreats and The Lesbian Roadshow throughout the U.S. in awesome destinations where our motto is, "love out loud" with Adventures in Love.  You can learn more about those at lesbiancouples.co.

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