Creating Lesbian Relationships With Love
At Lesbian Adventures in Love, we understand the challenges of same-sex relationships. Couples counseling is expensive and often ineffective. Typical relationship courses are full of heterosexuals, and destination retreats for lesbian couples weren’t even a thing until we came along in 2018! Our mission is to provide effective and affordable solutions for your relationship issues. We offer a science-based approach to relationship coaching, specifically for lesbian couples. Our online courses, coaching, and retreats create a supportive and empowering environment tailored to your needs. No cookie cutters here.
We see you. We’ve got you. We are you.
We see you
We’ve got you.
We are you.
HOW WE HELP LESBIAN COUPLES
Personalized guidance and support to help you and your partner work through challenges and build a stronger, more fulfilling relationship.
Transform your relationship with our vacation experiences designed specifically for lesbian couples. Join other female couples in a safe, supportive environment and achieve effective and rapid results.
Experience a uniquely effective approach to relationship development in our classes, with participants reporting more progress in just six weeks than they did in a year of couples counseling.
Trained and Certified
How Healthy is Your Relationship?
FAQ
Dr. Michele O'Mara is a licensed clinical sexologist, relationship expert, and author based in Indiana, USA. She received her Ph.D. in Clinical Sexology from the American Academy of Clinical Sexologists and has over 20 years of experience in mental health. Dr. O'Mara specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate relationship issues, focusing on supporting the LGBTQ+ community, especially lesbian couples. She is dedicated to promoting diversity, inclusivity, and affirmative therapy practices. Along with her wife, Kristen, Dr. O'Mara provides relationship-transforming retreats for lesbian couples in various locations throughout the US and abroad. She has also developed an approach to intimate communication called "The Art of Wholehearted Communication", which she teaches through her online course of the same name. Dr. O'Mara is the author of "Just Ask: 1,000 Questions to Grow Your Relationship," a book that provides practical guidance for couples to deepen their connection and understanding of each other. She is a member of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) and is dedicated to promoting diversity, inclusivity, and affirmative therapy practices.
Education
- Ph.D. in Clinical Sexology from the American Academy of clinical Sexologists (2012)Dissertation on the Correlation between Sexual Frequency and Relationship Satisfaction among lesbians.
- Masters of Social Work from Indiana University-Purdue University (2002)
- Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) (2004)
Certifications and Additional Training
- Certified Imago Therapist (2005)
- Gottman Method trained all three levels (2014)
- Trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) by Sue Johnson(2015 & 2020)
- Certified Discernment Counselor (2015)
- Trained Accelerated Resolution Therapist-ART Therapist(2022)
Resources and Publications
- Founder of Lesbian Adventures in Love (#lesbianloveadv) which offers relationship-transforming vacations (lesbian couples retreats)
No, not really. I do not believe relationship care belongs in the mental health field. Everyone struggles with relationships. They are complicated and involve fundamental skills that most of us were not taught. Healthy relationships require emotionally-regulated systems. In relationships, our nervous systems are in constant communication – sending cues of danger or cues of safety. It is our job to understand one another’s nervous systems. This is not intuitive. Often, we need help in understanding how to do this. When your system interprets danger, you automatically move into self-protective reactions. When you sense cues of safety, you are able to relax, be playful and let your guard down. Effective communication requires an accurate understanding of automated reactions and conscious efforts to change this wiring. The good news is, you CAN change the automated reactions that are hardwired in your nervous system by doing small things over and over. I'm not interested in labels, in picking sides or rehashing our latest conflicts. I am interested in teaching you the fundamentals of healthy relationships and supporting you in doing the right small things, often.
My online scheduler is available at www.omaratime.com 24/7. If our schedules play well, you are welcome to grab a session.
Couples sessions are 80 minutes ($225).
Testimonial
Anonnymous
The art of wholehearted communication is an excellent class that any lesbian couple could benefit from regardless of where they are in their relationship. You have to put the work into it and read the coursework as well as practice the skills to benefit from it.
Susan L, North Carolina
I'd recommend this course to anyone. Michele is an excellent coach and facilitator. Her style is also engaging: she has a great sense of humor, has sound applications, and provides a safe space. It's evident that Michele has spent a great deal of time and created a user-friendly and practical course. The material is invaluable to cultivating a prosperous, loving, communicative, heart-centered relationship
Merri Nannarone, Holiday, FL
I think it is a wonderful course to learn how to communicate. I thought I was communicating until I took this course and I learned that I was too busy formulating my response to really listen. I also struggled with how to validate my partner - to tell her that I heard her - this course taught me how to do that.
Bonnie and Natasha from Canada
The sessions show us how our nervous systems have influenced our lives in so many ways that were completely hidden from us, in spite of the fact that we've both been in counseling and studied things like non-violent communication for years! I just want to say how much we both appreciate the knowledge you brought together for this course and, more importantly, for the way you delivered it.
Kelly Lynch, Texas
Go. I think our most repeated line since Utah has been “Everyone needs a lesbian couples retreat”!
Flagstaff, AZ
It ended up being far better and more useful than I expected! It helped to be able to learn from other couples and the coaching that they received. The atmosphere was one that allowed trust and vulnerability between couples and within the group. The adventures and free time also allowed opportunities to get to know other couples and/or have some alone time to reconnect. Honestly, it was a wonderful experience and we are excited to continue on in the cohort for accountability and connection.
Salt Lake City, UT
Retreat was worth every penny! If you want to be closer to your partner and learn how to talk to your partner or wife in a more directed and non confrontational way, this retreat gives you the skills to do so.
Not only was it such a lovely retreat, but the women that attended were all so fantastic and forthcoming. I felt safe and that was important as I wasn't sure going into it that I would feel that way
Denton, Texas
It was great! It goes over a lot of information and helps couples communicate in more effective ways. It really goes to the heart. It was helpful to hear other couples’ stories and Michelle had great insight into behavioral patterns and ways to make practical changes. I’m very thankful! It helped my marriage a lot and we made new friends. A million thank yous!
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
It was an amazing, life-changing experience. The space created made it comfortable to share and be vulnerable. There is something truly amazing about sharing space and learning with other lesbian couples.
K. C. Milwaukee, WI
It was wonderfully unexpected. Amazing to see and interact with so many power couples in one setting. Great time, a great vacation, and great people. The thirty-minute session break out with Michele was really helpful, it had been a while since feeling seen. Having both Michele and Kristen there during the group sessions was helpful, they have such a great dynamic. The course material was nothing I had ever heard before it's all woman-to-woman pronouns. Can't wait to join another experience in the future. Thank you for your time, wisdom, and patience.
Jennifer K, Seattle, WA
It breathed new life into my marriage. I was afraid it would just rehash what we’d done in years of couple’s therapy but it got much deeper in a shorter amount of time and gave us immediate actionable tools and skills. I loved being able to witness and learn from all the other fantastic couples in attendance. Michele and Kristen are so real and committed to walking the talk. 10/10 recommend. The dynamic of you and Kristen being present during the sessions. It was valuable to have you both there demonstrating a real love that deals with real problems, just like we all have. I thought it showed an advanced level of using the tools we were introduced to. #relationshipgoals The recordings have such valuable information and I’m happy to have them as an ongoing resource. Just wow. The retreat helped me learn how to discover my true feelings and needs and express them effectively. I feel more understood and that has renewed my hope for relationship success. Our conflicts decreased and we are more focused on loving each other. I’m so grateful to have had this uniquely wonderful experience. Thank you.
Kimberly Meyer, Belleville, IL (not w/photos)
It’s worth every penny and hands down the best relationship information we’ve received.
Christy, Indiana
Highly recommended if you want to foster effective communication in your relationship, explore potential roadblocks, and learn more about your partner’s point of view. We learn from each other. Not just from our differences but also what we have in common: we aren’t alone. It’s an immersive crash course in communication—fantastic!
Kelly, Bloomington, Indiana
This is an incredible experience and opportunity for deeper connection and growth, no matter what stage of relationship yours may be. We are a relatively "new" couple of almost 9 months and chose to participate as a proactive step in building upon our foundation. It exceeded our expectations! Initially (working with other couples) felt more vulnerable, but it quickly became a critical element that enhanced the exercises because we were able to watch and learn from them, & relate to their experiences. Conversely, it felt nice when other couples could relate to our dynamic/experiences and share how they connected. It jumps right into the work of the counseling without so much of the "getting to know us" type deal. The exercises are similar, but having an "audience" of other couples really enhances the experience by sharing/learning with and from them. It's more concentrated and powerful in the group! Extraordinarily well done, Michele and Kristen; having you both share your perspectives lent a nice balance and a more personalized touch to the boot camp! I am So glad that we decided to do this so early on in our relationship...enhanced "us" so much!
D. Lorenz, Indiana
I think this Boot Camp is worth going to once a year! It is truly an investment in the most important relationship you have here on this earth. The focus is on how to communicate with each other and who doesn’t need that?!? So many communication skills apply to other areas of my life too. We are all human and learn at our own speed. It is so refreshing to be with other couples who desire to learn and grow. This means we commit to be vulnerable with each other and give grace which becomes the soil for our own growth. It is structured and guided throughout a whole weekend which allows you to dig deeper and come to terms with your own responsibility and freedom to choose change for yourself which then blossoms into liberty and growth in your relationship.
Roda Hajo, Phoenix, AZ
It was worth my time because it gave me actionable feedback on how to approach conversations with my spouse. Also, it was just nice to spend time with a group of lesbians. it is helpful to hear other couples bring real examples to the class so you can learn from them rather than always using your own, sometimes too painful, examples to learn from. There is less "talking through" your week and more guided learning which we needed. I need someone to push me to understand something rather than just reflect on my week.
Maria Sostre – Milwaukee, WI
It is very well worth it, you learn a lot about yourself that maybe you didn't realize before and you do learn new things about your partner. It's comforting because you see other people with the same issues but different situations and it lets you know that you are not alone. It's saving you money and it's more in-depth than couples counseling. I can't wait to go and do a face-to-face boot camp.
Valerie Jackson – Houston, TX
It is an enlightening experience that has the propensity to create a healthy dialog between the couple. The short-term impact is that you learn the skills to have effective dialog. The long-term goal is that this methodology will continue. I enjoyed the virtual camp oppose to the in-person. The reason is that we have kids and I did not have to figure out who will care for them in our absence. Also, there is comfort in being in your own familiar space. It is very helpful and good to know that we are not the only couple experiencing similar problems. The other couples give insight into addressing those issues. Extremely, because there is way more exchange of ideas to overcome the challenges that we experience as a couple.
Jade – Phoenix, AZ
Hands down must do. No questions asked!! Very helpful tools and very simple ways to apply. It was like a year of couples counseling in one weekend, with concrete examples, tools, and help. We tackled hard conversations in what seemed impossible before, in 3 days, with ease and with help and guidance. Me, my wife and I don't know too many lesbian couples in our neighborhood (we live in Arizona...) and it was so refreshing to see so many lesbian couples together working on similar issues. It felt so welcoming and helped us work through our "problems" by learning from others. Loved it!
Joanne Rosa – Milwaukee, WI
I was completely blown away by the Boot Camp, the content was amazing, the atmosphere (even virtually) was so warm and welcoming, and Michele and Kristen facilitated such a wonderful weekend. My wife and I took so many useful tools away from this weekend, we are so grateful we found Adventures in Love. It's very educational and an amazing experience to see what other couples may be experiencing. To help better prepare ourselves how to handle certain situations we may not have come across yet. I can't speak highly enough about both you and your wife. This retreat to say the least was very much so an eye-opener for me. On how I can have a more positive approach to things and be the best version of myself within our relationship.
Kristn – Arlington, VA
It was awesome! I was a little hesitant-not sure what to expect. We both were. From the time we entered the house, it was a safe and welcoming environment. Michele is AMAZING So knowledgeable and cares about everyone, regardless of what issues are at hand. Kristen is the Hostess with the Mostest. Thank you both for everything.
Carolee – Arlington, VA
It was absolutely amazing! We didn’t want to leave! Michele is the best counselor I’ve ever been to. She has the innate ability to make everyone feel comfortable and share. Michele and Kristen - you guys are a great team and I enjoyed how you both shared your couple stories! Kristen did a fantastic job taking care of logistics - personally making sure we were comfortable and well-fed!
Emily – Bloomington, IN
It was great! Even though Michele is our therapist I wasn’t sure what to expect. We learned so much, really enjoyed meeting new people and appreciated the built in downtime. You were definitely right about how much more ground we were able to cover. Being able to hear other couples interact and discuss their stories is a priceless part of the learning experience (and not at all intimidating, which i thought it would be!)
Piper – Bloomington, IN
It was nothing like what you would conjure up in your head! It was engaging, and very informative. You only need 2 flannels (:D). Michele is a master at ferreting out the feelings/emotions you need to focus on.
Angela Lamb – Memphsi, TN
The Lesbian Couples Retreat was a beneficial experience wheres The experience was enlightening and confirming because we weren't the only couple experiencing struggles in their relationship.Michele will break down the barriers blocking you from moving past your issues but will support you through the entire process in a very kind way...even though you may not see that in the moment. 😉
Lyndsey Ketchum-Harkless, Springiled, OR
What an amazing experience! Nothing like I would have thought it would be like and I really felt like I learned more about myself than I never thought I could. I learned a deep love for my partner, how we communicate, and what it means to be in a relationship together.
Anna K – Eugene, OR
The retreat was challenging, transformative, and eye-opening. I feel rejuvenated in my marriage. We put in a lot of intensive work but balanced it with quality time together. I feel so lucky to have been able to go and feel like it was the best decision we could have made. You have to go!
Aja Atwood – MA
Enjoyed it! Cathie and I had a chance to reconnect and understand each other better. It was easy to open up and share even with the other couples present. Nice to have a safe environment to discuss issues that pertain to lesbian couples. I enjoyed getting to know Kristen and seeing/hearing stories about your relationship and the struggles you face. Definitely a dynamic duo!
Lindsay Thorstenson – Buda, TX
I didn't know what to expect going into the weekend, but I was very impressed overall. It was a nice mix of the lecture material for the group and a couple of role plays with a focus on couple-specific issues. The tools learned during the seminar are very applicable. Highly recommended! Good food, a wonderful mix of people, and a good book to take home. Honestly, I wish it was longer!!
Tricia Williams – Rubicon, WI
It was fantastic. I simply cannot put the experience into words, the best thing I can say is GO!!! Experience this wonderful retreat for yourself! Your life is sure to change for the better!
Angela – Texas
I highly recommend it! It doesn’t matter what stage your relationship is in, this experience will benefit you. We were able to open up in a way we haven’t been able to do on our own, and we continue to use the skills at home. The friends we made were an added bonus, we had such a good time! The way you and Kristen interact with the couples. You treated us like a friends not clients. It made it really easy to let my guard down quickly. A+, I feel so thankful for the experience. No matter how things turn out we are going to be better co-parents because of the tools and knowledge we gained, so thank you, I accomplished my goal.
N – Washington
I would say that it was truly one of the most unique and valuable experiences of my life. The environment was safe, fun and encouraging. Don't change the intimate setting, your involvement and vulnerability with those that you are coaching.
Gwen – Washington
A feeling of fun, safety, and inclusion. Michele is highly skilled, real, and compassionate. The retreat allowed us to get real about our issues while making real progress in our relationship. Don't change your realness and the adventure of it. Loved the homestead trip together as a group.:) After class, when we all got together as friends. We often debriefed. This was a valuable casual time for us as a group. People asked questions of each other that maybe they didn't feel comfortable asking in a structured setting. A very valuable time.
Chris O- Jackson, NJ
A mind-blowing experience in which I felt that Michele nurtured the relationship and our love for each other while gentling leading us to truths about ourselves. Nothing like what I expected, and one of the best experiences I can imagine. A wonderful, positive, safe, nurturing, and, above all, fun environment for opening up and learning skills to make our relationship the best it can be.
Frankie – Jackson, NJ
An enjoyable and enlightening learning experience. The structure of the retreat sessions created a safe place that allow all the "feels" to come to the surface. I highly recommend it to all couples who are looking to deepen their connection.
Cole Strauher, PhD, Oregon
If you are a lesbian couple… just sign up. Honestly, right now. Go to the website and Register for a retreat. You won’t be sorry. Michelle is a skilled professional and creates an environment of healing that works for all types of folks. The information is easy to apply but with a powerful impact. And the retreat schedule leaves plenty of room for respective couple’s needs. Who you are. You personally made the retreat for me. Your calm pace, confidence, warmth, honest humanity, compassion, tenacity with individuals. I feel safe with you, Michelle. I’m so grateful that lesbian couples have you in our corner. Thanks for seeing us Through your healing lens.
Tara. M. Massachusetts
AMAZING! My gf and I knew we loved the hell out of each other but had hit a rough spot and basically lost hope in our own abilities to get through… I had no idea what to expect, but wow did it felt like divine intervention! We learned so much about ourselves and each other (thru tears and laughter) and returned home with new understanding and HOPE. Total game changer! JUST GO! Best $ ever spent… The humor, the safe space for openness and vulnerability, the flexibility, and all that you are and bring to these experiences. In witnessing Michele & Kristen’s realness together, we observed the gift of two people who love the hell out of each other and want to do all they can to make it work in a beautiful way. You are 2 wholehearted people which to me was like seeing a unicorn x2! Thanks!! I want to thank you for taking the time SEE us and for creating a space where we could safely go deeper within ourselves and honor the thoughtful process of communicating with love and understanding. In doing so, we were able to break habits of unproductive and even detrimental conversations. I have learned that the goal is not to prevent conflict; rather, the magic is the way in which we repair!
Amber Rossville, Leadville, CO
This experience was incredibly impactful to not only understanding how our past influences how we show up today but also in gathering tools to continue developing the healthiest relationship. The community and connection that quickly develops during the retreat is priceless. We left feeling energized, committed, and filled with passion for the next chapter of our story.
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“Curiosity is the spark that ignites our passions, and love is the flame that fuels our pursuits.”
-Unknown
Get Curious with Just Ask! A book of questions (or get the app) by Michele O’Mara, PhD
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